Upon choosing the name of this blog, I'm reminded of a certain scene in the movie "Mean Girls" where Damien describes the nosiest, most gossip-y member of "The Plastics": "That's why her hair is so big - it's full of secrets!"
Now I wouldn't say my 'fro is full of more than some mild gel and bobby pins, but I have to admit that I can relate to the big-haired mean girl in the fact that I am quite inquisitive (read: nosy) about other people's lives and business. I don't spread the word about people afterward usually, but I like knowing things about people for the sake of knowing. I was a journalism major in college, so asking questions and getting to know more about people comes with the territory. It's actually a running joke in my family about the crazy, thought-provoking questions I come up with, just so as to find out more about my favorite people. I've thrown out everything from, "Money aside, what would your dream job be?" to "If you were black, how would you wear your hair?"
Now that my randomness has been properly proven, I'd like to say welcome to my first official blog entry! I used to blog a lot on my MySpace, but since my profile there has gone defunct (OK, I'm actually avoiding an ex on there. Can you blame me?), I've decided to join the blogosphere so that my random rants, raves and musings can reach all people, even non-MySpacers.
I've kept a journal ever since I was about 7, so I've never been one to shy away from chronicling my life. I hope to keep you entertained as I bring you along on my journey through my early 20s as I navigate the world of work, family, friendships, romance (or lack thereof), politics and my oh-so-adorable cat Cammie.
To get this this entry flowin', I'm taking the advice of my friend Alanna and sharing a collection of anecdotes about the comedy that is my love life. Ahh, yes. While tragedy has ensued in this arena, I'm fairly certain I'm past the bitter, heartbroken phase and can now look back on some of my experiences and laugh. I broke up with someone about 3 months ago and we haven't talked since. This is HUGE for me, given my old co-dependent ways. I used to not be able to let people go, probably because I just assumed that there wouldn't be anybody else out there. Word of advice: there will ALWAYS be another bus to catch, even if that bus eventually runs you over or drives away without a second glance. Have faith, another bus will be en route your way. And I have hope that one day, it'll eventually be a Bentley stretch limo that comes my way.
Anyway, back to the comedy. I discovered recently that as a single gal, people are always trying to set you up. While that is thoughtful, it's also a recipe for disaster (i.e. uncomfortable blind dates, forced polite rejections from my end, and repeating the same "all about me" spiel to each loser that enters my life). Just because I'm not in a relationship does not mean I'm unhappy or "looking" for someone! I don't believe in "looking," since that usually requires wearing blinders and thinking that every douche bag that walks my way is actually Mr. Right in disguise. Looking for love has made me stupid; therefore, I've found that I like myself more when I'm content with just being independent and unattached.
So in the months following my break up, I met some pretty uneligible bachelors with one thing in common: kids! Lordy, I'm 23! In no way am I stepmom material. There was guy #1, whom I'll call Mr. Bomb-Dropper (BD for short). Mr. BD and I shared a couple fun dates, and I was feeling him at first. He was smart, educated, sweet, attentive. After about date #3, he finally spills: "Umm, I have a 3-year-old son, and I feel like shit for not telling you earlier." Damn right you should feel like shit! That would have been a nice piece of information to know before I started doodling our names together (OK, I'm exaggerating. I didn't like him all that much, but this whole kid business sure put the brakes on whatever minimal feelings I had for the padre). Needless to say, that ended fairly quickly. I told him I didn't have feelings for him; he asked what he did wrong and how could he make it better. Umm, don't think it would make us soul mates or anything, but you could have tried going back in time and wrapping it up, my friend!
Then there was the next guy after him (don't worry - I'm no hussy. These were all just dates and nothing more. Obviously these characters are not even getting first-name mentions, hence how irrelevant and short-lived my interactions with them were). We'll call this one Mr. Grandpa. Now, he wasn't a grandpa by any means. He was 5 years my senior, but he sure as hell looked like a senior himself! At least 10 years older than his real age. That should have been my tip-off. He had a kid too, but he was honest from the get-go. I gave it a chance because I figured it would make a good story. We lasted one date and that's it. He was super nice but so not my type (i.e. looked like he could be my dad). Plus I'm pretty sure he was a die-hard Republican (not that I have an issue with Repos. I just don't really want to marry one!). Mr. Grandpa was a set-up date, and the person setting us up told me she "had a really good feeling about this one. A sixth sense." OK, Haley Joel Osment. There was no attaction whatsoever. I appreciate the effort, but eccck!
Lastly, there was a guy who asked for my business card at a client event. He was pretty attractive, but again, seemed to be quite a bit older than me (I was right - 10 years older!). We'll call this guy Mr. Declarative (as in declarative sentences. You'll see what I mean in a minute). After 2 weeks or so, he finally e-mailed me. At that point I'd already dismissed him because I'm a firm believer in making things happen right away if you really want it. Mr. Declarative obviously treated meeting me as an afterthought, so I was surprised to hear from him. He asked how I was, and I kid you not, that was the last question he asked. We went back and forth a bit via e-mail, but every response he had was him talking about himself and never asking about me. Wow, super attractive, buddy! First you act too busy to send a 2-second e-mail to me. Now you appear nonchalant and apathetic in the e-mail chain YOU initiated. Eww. Oh, and in true Tracy-always-attracts-the-rejects fashion, he revealed he has a daughter - a 12-year-old! That's a red flag the size of India.
So basically, set ups are irritating and kind of a waste of time. While they make interesting blog fodder, I don't think I'll be dating any randoms anytime soon. I do like to have male company every now and again since I don't want to only surround myself with girls, but overall, single life is good! Easier, less stress, less overanalyzing. I say that now since it's only been 3 months. But who knows if I'll be singing a different tune once the year mark comes around. After awhile, who knows if I'll be desperate for that bus - heck, a messenger bike - to come along! Stay tuned.